Chemicals Burn Nude

“I don’t know how this happened,” Nathan told Julie over the phone. He paced the living room, telling Julie what he remembered about the previous night.

“And you’re telling me you woke up wearing someone else’s clothes?” Julie said, muting the phone to let out a belly laugh. Julie wiped her tears with a tissue.

“Hello? You know, I’m glad you’re amused.” Nathan blew out an exasperated breath.

Julie’s voice returns through suppressed laughter. “I’m sorry.” Julie doubled over, laughing as though someone was tickling her. “It’s hard to believe some dude broke into your house. I mean, look at this from my point of view.”

“Who said it was a guy?” Nathan said through drawn-out words.

“Wait, are you telling me you’re wearing women’s clothes?”

Nathan paused.

“Oh, my fucking God. I’ll be right there. Don’t change.”

Who would do this to me and why? Nathan thought. Nathan stood before the large bedroom mirror, studying the black skirt hiked above his knees, a white satin bra, a tan blazer, and panties that had him scratching his balls. It appeared a blind man had applied red lipstick to Nathan’s face. Nathan sunk into his maroon leather couch near the fireplace.

He had a few Redhook last night, but nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing that would knock him out for 10 hours. He’d finished a water bottle and headed for bed.

Knocking at the door startled Nathan to his feet.

Nathan hurried to the door, swung it open, and posed like a runway model. “Well…”

Julie covered a giggle and moved through the door.

“You look…”

“Ridiculous. You can say it,” Nathan said, locking the deadbolt.

Julie folded her lips under her teeth and tilted her head, giving him a once over. “Red’s not your color.”

“Seriously? You see me dressed up as a woman, and all you can think of is the shade of my—”

“Kidding.” Julie embraced him. “I was kidding.”

“How do you think this happened to me?”

“Beats me.” Julie shrugged. “How much did you drink last night with the guys?”


Julie crossed her arms and tapped her foot the way she did when she knew Nathan wasn’t being sincere.

“Three. I had three beers and nothing more,” Nathen said in a defensive tone.

“So, did you piss off some old flame?” Julie smirked.

“Not a chance in hell.”

“Must be someone you know.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“So I hope you don’t get too bent out of shape.”

“Should I be?”

“Pam and I—”

“I told you that bitch was bad news. But nobody ever listens to little old Nathan.”

“Would you let me explain?”

“Oh, right,” Nathan said, throwing his hands skyward. “There’s got to be an explanation for this one.”

“We were experimenting with chemicals for chemistry.”

Nathen motioned to himself. “What does that have to do with me being dressed up as a woman?”

“This is going to sound bad.” Julie gestured for calm. “Pam mixed the date-rape drug into your water bottle.”

“I should rat you out to the cops,” Nathan said, pointing his finger at Julie.

“Would you relax? It was not my idea, and I tried to tell you. But then I noticed the water was gone, and I didn’t have it in me to tell you.”

“I can’t believe I trusted you.”

“How else was I supposed to get even?”

“Wait,” Nathan said, rubbing his temples. “You dressed me up like a woman because why?”

“Well, I had a little help.”

“Pam? This idea was Pam’s, wasn’t it?”

“No,” Julie said. “It was my idea.”

“And this was your way of getting back at me?”

“I’m sure you remember Mrs. Jenkin’s 9th-grade biology class.”

“Not exactly great memories, but go ahead.”

“You called me a boy because I had short hair with frizzed split ends.”

“Now that, I don’t recall.”

“I guess it was your twin,” Julie said with a dismissive chuckle.

“In fact, it was,” Nathan said. “I have a twin sister.”

Julie tilted her head, crinkling her eyes as though she couldn’t see him. “You have a twin?”

“Her name is Pam.”

“My friend Pam?”

“You need to be punished.”

Julie protrudes her lower lip. “I’ve been a bad, bad girl.”

“Take your clothes off.” Julie complied.

“I’m going to taste your body until—”

“Until I forgive you?”

“Until you know I love you.”

(© 2022 AC)

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